Reflections on Parenting

As I laid in bed this morning and became more and more aware of the daylight creeping through the window, my thoughts turned to our family. I was thinking specifically about the fact that Will and I have just passed 10 years of marriage, which sometimes seems short......sometimes long.

I thought about what our life would look like in another 10 years.

Deaven at 19, would be heading off for his mission for the church or college.

Peyton at 16, would be in the throws up dating boys, learning to drive, attending High School, being involved in Young Women's at church, and everything else that is incorporated with being a 16 yr old girl.

Morgan, who is such a little midget of a human, would be heading into Junior High (the most trying of times) and just getting involved all the opportunities that come with turning 12.

Then, I started to panic.

I, we, can not afford to not give our best efforts in this home NOW. We will run out of time, no matter how long and trying this phase of parenting feels.

Our kids have got to know that when they are in the throws of being teenagers, faced with many of the ugly things of this world, that OUR HOME will always be a safe place for them. One that they can count on for support, love and strength. That they can feel safe to question, admit, express, inquire and learn, and always be met with unconditional love and concern.

Sometimes parenting the "right way" is exhausting, but with this perspective, I know I can be patient just a little longer, love and little more passionately, giggle a little more frequently and embrace every waking moment I have with my children, who actually WANT to be with me and around me.

So....in the midst of these thoughts, Peyton came into our room and I beckoned her to come snuggle as I lifted up my blankets. I held her close and said, "Guess what I was just thinking about?" I immediately confessed to my visions of her being 16, beautiful, learning to drive, enjoying High School (I think I left the boy part out.....no need to fuel that fire yet), and as I spoke her eyes got wide with excitement.

Then, she turn to me and said, "Mom, will you still be alive?"

Wow. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. I think I did both. I reassured her that she was stuck with me forever (though I knew a promise like that is actually impossible to make to your child).

At that moment, I committed even more to embrace each day with my kids. They are everything to us.

This weekend at General Conference for our church, which was fantastic, one of the most touching things that were said was this:

"Pray for your children, with total confidence, that you are in a partnership with the Savior in their behalf". Henry B. Eyring

Deaven, Peyton and Morgan, you are loved by your Mom and Dad so much. Despite our moments of weakness, we pray everyday that we can be the kind of parents you deserve. There is nothing you could ever do that would change how much we love you. We want to be your best friends, but we will always make our responsibility of teaching you right from wrong our top priority. You are raised in a home that believes in God and Jesus Christ. Because of that knowledge, this is a home of joy, hope, love, passion, forgiveness and compassion, and often, you have been the ones to teach us those principles. Thank you for being the children you are. You are beautiful in every way.